splitbeak: (Default)
[personal profile] splitbeak
Jan. 3:
In Hollyweird

Years after the cowboy movie star Gene Autry retired from the big screen, he looked at how Hollywood was changing and commented, "Today you see girls doing on the screen what they used to do off the screen to get on screen."



Jan. 6:
In Hollyweird

Movie mogul Darryl Zanuck, the head of 20th Century Fox, made the mistake of asking the caustic wit Oscar Levant for his opinion of the studio's new film.
"I think the picture stinks," Levant replied.
"Who the hell are you to think the picture stinks?" Zanuck fumed.
Levant replied quite reasonably, "Who the hell do you have to be to think the picture stinks?"



Jan. 7:
Ask A Dumb Question

A woman wrote to Dear Abby asking, "Are birth control pills deductible on my income tax?"
Abby had a simple response: "Only if they don't work."



Jan. 8:
The Business of Stupidity

A reporter asked the famous lawyer Clarence Darrow if hard work was responsible for his success in court.
"I guess so," Darrow answered. "I was raised on a farm. One hot day I was packing down stacks of hay, and by noon I was totally exhausted. The next day, I left the farm, never to return, and I haven't done a day of hard work since."



An Irish Blessing

May the road rise to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face and the rain fall soft upon your fields.

And until we meet again, may God hold you in the hollow of his hand.

August 2011

S M T W T F S
  123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031   

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Dec. 24th, 2025 09:31 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios